Blending in

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Sometimes, when a client requests something very different for them to enjoy, nine times out of 10, it is very different for their escort, too.

Jacob is a very successful and talented songwriter and is constantly jetting off around the world on business meetings and hooking up with artists at their swanky homes or hired venues. He tells me this is all well and good, and he gets to visit some beautiful places, but sometimes he wants to let his hair down and go. Being as successful as he is, Jacob only has a little time off, and when he does, he always makes sure he books some girlfriend experience time with his favourite escort. This usually entails hanging out at his vast Belgravia mansion, just chilling together and doing “normal couple” things before he jets off to New York, Paris, or wherever else the A and R lot tells him to go.

So, with a rare three days off, Jacob has asked me to accompany him to a club in Central London and told me to check my e-mail for an essential list of requirements for his favourite escort. I will tell you that when I read it, I headed straight out the door for an extraordinary shopping trip.

Jacob had requested that we go to a mainstream club, with no VIP or guest list, and blend into the crowd, but blend in with me dressed as any other woman in the club…

Now, this may seem simple, but Jacob insists that I adhere to the high street trends of today, complete with hair extensions, fake tan and lots of bling. I am all for dressing up and having a laugh, but I was stumped for ideas on how to blend in when I am more than used to clubs in the VIP section dressed in my usual designer gear and being coiffed to perfection.

I am far from a snob, and usually, I don’t mind where I go or what I wear, but when you’re going to a mainstream club and under the watchful eye of so many others, I know I have to get my look spot on. Cue internet searches and glossy magazine scouring.

Remember I told you, whatever my client wants (within reason), they get, and I’m sure my TOWIE makeover just about fits into the within reason category…

Food for thought…

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Most of the time, my clients want me to be well-turned out, svelte, sexy and, well… arm candy.

I sport all my finest labels (usually within at least two seasons of purchase unless it’s vintage, of course), making sure my hair is tousled and my make-up subtle. Above everything else, I want to look good for me.

So when a client asks me to wear something I wouldn’t mind ruining, I have all sorts of visions. Extreme sports? Quad-biking? Mud wrestling…? Well, maybe not the latter, as that would usually involve two London escorts and a rather skimpy bikini. So, I went for clothes I typically wear when I decorate and tied my hair up in a messy ponytail. It went against all my principles, but when clients call, they call the shots.

I arrived at his sumptuous Kensington apartment bang on eleven o’clock. Usually, my clients can hear my stilettos from a mile away, but wearing pumps meant I arrived unannounced. Jasper answered my knock promptly and showed me through his hallway to a large white room right at the back. The walls were as stark as the tiled floor, and there was a giant dust sheet covering most of the sparse furniture. Set up at the window was a tripod with a long-lens camera being tended to by a trendy young man; Jasper introduced him as his wingman, Mark.

The thing that concerned me the most was there was a long table on the left-hand side of the room. On this table were creamy cakes and tall blancmanges, all decorated with strawberries, cream and icing. They wouldn’t have looked out of place on a hostess trolley at The Dorchester; Jasper stuck his finger into one of them and licked the digit clean. “Perfect,” he said. Suddenly, a light bulb went off in my head. I looked first from Mark, looking through the lens and adjusting his shot, to Jasper, who was watching me. With a grin, I went to one of the blancmanges and took a fistful. I lobbed it at Jasper, and the flash went off on Mark’s camera. With almost a guttural scream of joy, my client dived for the table and its contents. Within a few minutes, there was a full-scale food fight going on.

I was covered from head to toe in sponge, cream filling and jam. The floor, walls and even the ceiling had an uneven coating of patisserie goodness. I should have brought a shower cap as a whole trifle upended over my brunette locks. I felt a triple shampoo and condition coming on when I got home.

The only thing I should have had the foresight on was a change of clothes! Thankfully, Jasper lent me a pair of joggers and a jumper for my journey back to Mayfair. But my oh my, what fun!

The exclusivity of Hampstead…

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Hampstead, commonly known as Hampstead Village, is an area of North London, 4 miles north-west of Charing Cross. Exclusive to a point and home to more than one or two millionaires, this elegant Victorian district is genuinely something to behold – especially in summer when many open-air attractions are on the agenda to bring in tourists from far and wide.

As well as being home to the rich and famous, Hampstead Heath has also been the locality for the 1980s films “Labyrinth” and “An American Werewolf in London”. Regents Park and Primrose Hill are right on the doorstep, as well as many long-standing restaurants and traditional pubs.
With all this splendour around them, is it any wonder that our stunning gallery of Hampstead escorts is among the most beautiful and clever in London?

Our North and central London escorts know all about out-calls in Hampstead and where to go for some “quiet time for two”. Ladies from Fulham, Chelsea, escorts in Baker Street and Kensington, such as Sandra and Elayne, will delight and enchant you with their European accents, sweet personalities and sensual curves. Whatever your preference, both girls are available for home and international assignments.

If these ladies don’t tempt you, then we have many more on our books who are willing to travel to Hampstead; they will never be longer than 35 minutes. So, if you thought Hampstead was a little out of the way for our ladies, then fear not – they love this upmarket area.

Have we convinced you yet? For a touch of elegance and a sophisticated date you won’t forget in a hurry, call us on 07811 160 160 or email us. Our ladies work around the clock, and we will always have a suitable lady for you, whatever time you call.

Whatever takes your fancy…?

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I meet all kinds of people. From Belgravia to Kingston, from New York to Hong Kong. Tall men, short men, confused women and the odd married billionaire; nothing fazes me. As an expensive London escort, I revel in diversity, and in the amount of time that I have been doing this, very little has shocked me or made my eyebrows shoot into my back pocket. I am immune to shock, or so I thought.

I went out on a first date with Marco some time ago when he founded a new record label. He got to mix with some big stars and was so incredibly busy he didn’t have time to find his special someone, so he sought out my services and, residing in Mayfair himself, found my location very convenient. He took me to his label launch party and thrust me into the celebrity world. I was taken aback by his penchant for new and existing acts and quite impressed by his diverse music tastes, or so I thought.

So with date number one complete and afters at a top Knightsbridge hotel, he told me he would call me and arrange some more rendezvous’.

I’ll tell you a little about the man in the music. He’s 43, stunningly handsome, charming, witty and clever. A London man, born and bred and incredibly wealthy, Marco owns homes in Mayfair, Hereford and Surrey in the UK and has an exquisite villa in the South of France and two studios in New York. His music library in his Mayfair penthouse is eclectic and exciting, and I spent a long time looking at the rows of CDs as I was bent over before them…

So, in my unshockable state, I didn’t think anything of it when Marco asked me to come to his study and perch on the edge of his desk whilst he loaded up his state-of-the-art computer and told me that he wanted to show me some artists he loved on YouTube.

I thought it was pretty sweet that he got so excited, and his face turned goofy/childlike as he typed into the search engine… “Best X Factor auditions”. Up popped millions of reality TV gold, and Marco was in his element. He had discussed with me previously what I should wear: underwear to match pop, rock and soul music. I had picked out my finest from Selfridge’s new designer display, and I had no idea I would be checking my Dirty Pretty Things (Soul) camisole to Austin Drage (who?) version of Billie Jean.

As lovely as some of the artists voice’ are, the audience clapping at the end of their performances sure does put a girl off her stride…well, almost.

Patience is a virtue

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Women can be manipulative – even the ones who say they aren’t having a more subtle undertaking to the art. As long as there is no element of de-masculation, where is the harm? My mother used to say “Ask don’t get; don’t ask, don’t want.” I disagree.

Let me set the scene for you…

I was at Westfield Shopping Centre ten minutes from Paddington this weekend with a rather delicious companion named Victor. Among the throngs of shoppers, and designer stores, I actually managed to get a lot of my shopping done. I do love shopping dates because usually I wouldn’t get the opportunity to spend a day queuing among other commoners, preferring to “add to cart” on Amazon.

So there we were, fingers entwined, our arms becoming full of branded carrier bags. Victor had dragged me into practically every man’s clothes shop there was (who says men aren’t fussy?) and I was thinking longingly of Kurt Geiger up on level one. I desperately wanted to slip my foot into the multi-coloured glitter stilettos that had been whispering lovingly to me from the website. As he tried on his fiftieth jumper, I was mentally itemising my wardrobe to justify £150 while subtracting the balance of my MasterCard from my credit limit.

Sensitive to the needs of others, I am pretty adept at diffusing a situation before it gets out of control and Victor was getting frustrated. I wanted my shoes and he wanted a change of scenery so I suggested Pret a manger which was “coincidentally” on level one. Smelling the lure of coffee and fresh sandwiches, Victor offered me a smile as we ascended the escalator and I mentally calculated that it would take 30 seconds to pass my beautiful shoes once we were nourished.

A man with a full belly is a happy man – and a man open to bribery. Close to the cafe was a huge Apple store with plenty of shiny laptops and iPads murmuring sweet nothings. Attention diverted from Fair Isle knitwear, Victor swung his hips through the door and took in a lungful of Broadband. A London escort such as me must have patience as a virtue: the patience to accept her needs come after those of her date. I watched Victor dribble over a MacBook Pro and counted down the minutes until I could lick the heel of that display shoe.

And then… a boom! Victor planted a kiss on my forehead and said, “darling, you have been so patient with me today. Let me buy my beautiful girl a present. Shall we look at something for you?” I could have wept. “Oh you don’t have to do that…” I said through my lashes. He made a sort of pooh-pooh noise and we fell into step… right past Kurt Geiger. And there they were… in the window, dazzling under the lights as I knew they would be… my shoes. Ten minutes later I had a shiny gift bag dangling from my arm and my date was looking very pleased with himself as I let him “choose” a pair, though I can’t say product placement didn’t play a part.

Call me manipulative then, if you want but you can’t say that my gentleman friend wasn’t completely happy to make me happy. The date had, as always, been about him and a trip to W12 I’m a big fan of West London, especially now I know where Kurt Geiger has an amazing store!